Krystle B's Testimony
Hi, my name is Krystle.
I came into The Esther Foundation on the 18th of March, 2016. I stayed and worked hard for my recovery for 3 years and 5 months, graduating on the 18th of August, 2019 (this photo of me was just after my graduation night).
I was always a happy kid, planting a smile on my face that slowly became a mask for me as I grew up. I was sexually abused by a family member at a young age and it was my secret. When it got found out, I was the reason for my family breaking up. I didn’t express how I felt and wouldn’t allow myself to feel upset or sad. I was a master at supressing my feelings and anger was what I used to feel in control and powerful.
At 8 years old my parents divorced due to my dad's indiscretions. I found it hard to understand and my world was ruined. I searched for love in all the wrong places and had a desire to be needed and a fear of being alone.
I was 14 years old when I met the father of my now 4 children. We were together for 4 years, and had our eldest daughter when I found out he had been injecting drugs behind my back the entire time. I could never forget this moment—as the life I loved crumbled and fell apart once again. Choosing to stay with him, I knew life would not be the same. I always wanted it to go back to before that moment, but of course I could not.
I started to wonder why he would choose drugs over family. I couldn’t understand at the time why someone would love drugs more than us. Unfortunately, this curiosity did not serve me well and as the saying goes, curiosity kills the cat!
I started injecting too and my new love was the feeling I got when using. It made all my worries and all my hurt disappear. I felt powerful and thought I was totally in control. I thought I could stop whenever I wanted to.
What an awful lie I believed.
Choosing drugs robbed me of so much over the next 13 years of my life. My health, my relationships and all those lost memories, I will never get back.
I was selfish and neglected my beautiful children. I was using every day and getting high was all that consumed my mind. I developed paranoia and was constantly tormented with panic attacks and anxiety. I didn’t know who I had become.
I cried out for help when I was at the end of everything and life didn’t seem worth living. I was scared for what life had in stall for my children and decided then to do whatever it took to fight for them and build a new and better future. Within a week of this, I found myself in Esther.
I now have a future that is bright, rich with potential for new memories to be made. I have restored family relationships and am healthy. I have been reunited with God who loves me and continues to bless my life. My children are happy and have a chance at this wonderful life we now share together.
Today, I am a Shift Leader—a proud worker at the Esther Foundation and am able to support, encourage and love everyone who comes through our doors. I pray they too will find the courage to fight for change, for their families, for children and most importantly—themselves.
Thank you for listening to some of my story,